Really?

I apologize to those of you that wish I would post more, I just haven't felt the creative juices flowing lately. Maybe it's the end of Summer and the start of a looooooong Minnesota Winter that's got me down. I promise to never leave you hanging again.

Let's get this party started...

Here's a little gem from the St. Paul Pioneer Press this morning...

Lottery Hoax Causes Riot At Coat Store

COLUMBUS, Ohio — A woman being driven around in a rented limousine pulled up at a coat store and announced she'd won the lottery and would pay for everyone's purchases, police said, but she ended up causing a riot when customers realized it was a hoax. Angry customers threw merchandise around and looted, police said.

Linda Brown was arrested Tuesday after an hours-long shopping spree that began when she hired a stretch Hummer limousine to drop her off at a Burlington Coat Factory store, police Sgt. Lt. Michael Deakins said. Brown walked to a cash register and announced she had won the lottery and would pay for each person's merchandise up to $500, he said.
People flooded the registers as cashiers began ringing up purchase after purchase, but Brown had not yet paid the bill, Deakins said.

My first question is why exactly would anyone who’s “won the lottery” go shop at a Burlington Coat Factory? Aren’t there a lot of nicer places a person could shop? Like K-mart? If I’m John Burlington, manager/owner of the Columbus, OH Coat factory, the first thing that would give me cause for concern is someone’s actually talking about paying cash for items, and not just using food stamps or some other government-aided subsidy. Right then and there, I’d know this lady is full of shit. Well actually, the FIRST thing that doesn’t seem right is the lady pulls up in a fucking stretch Hummer. To Burlington Coat Factory.

Now that I think about it, the very first thing that would concern me is that I’m working at a Burlington Coat Factory.

It gets better...

About an hour later, Brown had her driver take her to a bank to withdraw money, but she returned empty-handed, police Detective Steven Nace said.


So, the manager of the store, shit, wait, that's me, John Burlington. So, I decide it's a good idea to not only let this person offer to pay for everything, let my store get trampled and looted, before I check to see if this lady's telling the truth? Perhaps I could've checked for some kind of ticket, or proof that she's a recent lottery winner? I mean, there's got to be some kind of receipt right, or some kind of clip from the paper. Well, at least she had the cash on her. What's that you say? She didn't have the cash on her? She wants to do what now? She needs to go to the bank to make a withdrawl? No problem. I'm sure she's good for it. We'll just continue ringing these people in line and wait for her to get back.

And the best part is, she eventually does come back. WITH NOTHING. Are you fucking kidding me?